Saturday, July 20, 2013

The Agony of Blown Expectations; and, Jeeeeeeeeeeeeennnnnnnnns! #tdf

Run, Contador, Run!: look, for anyone else--like, say, a French squad--a fourth on GC and the win in the team classification would be the pinnacle of their Tour, even their careers. But for Alberto Contador, Bjarne Riis, and SaxoTinkoff, this looks--and feels--like crushing defeat. Leaving aside the fact that, assuming his alternately delirious and frightening twitter account isn't just a parody, Oleg Tinkov's probably gonna hunt him down bust his kneecaps and sink 'im to the bottom of some murky Siberian lake somewhere, Alberto, at only 30 and already one of the most prolific Grand Tour winners ever, has got to be ready to answer, what the !@#$ has happened to him? Whether it's because he's off the juice and this is just who he is, or Froome's on it doing it better, or there's some totally legitimate explanation, I gotta say, even *I'm* feeling glum for the little twerp. Hell, even Phil & Paul seem to have written 'em off like yesterday's boozy D-list starlet, ignoring him once he popped and hailing guys like Quintana and Talansky as the exciting new generation of cycling. Well, Alberto, be sure to avoid your team boss, Bjarne, I wouldn't !@#% with Tinkov either, and before you both take time off to reflect, mourn, and regroup, make sure you've got those anonymous plane tickets to Untraceableland in yer pockets!

Jeeeeeeeeennnnnnnnnnssssssss!: meanwhile, in sharp contrast to the depressing excitement shown by everyone whenever Andy Schleck now manages to stay two wheels off the autobus on a climb, the great Jens Voigt continues to show why, despite some acknowledgement of aging in his charming blogs, he'll probably still be obliterating 3/4 of the peloton when his grandkids retire ,with a bangin' attack off the breakaway he started that blew the group apart. We love you Jens! Oh, it just breaks my *heart* that someday my beloved "JJ & Jens & Fabian & Stuey" totebag will be obsolete...but come to think of it, probably it'll still wear out before Jens does!

Night Moves: well, it's on to a novel nighttime coronation for Cav on the Champs Elysees, a huge freakin' outpouring of lucrative contract offers for Richie Porte, and one last Tour wheelie for Sagan--so Froome, before everyone starts asking a bunch of stuff that'll just piss you off for the next year, you might as well start popping your Champagne now! PS You rock Purito!



2 comments:

Velocodger said...

Nairo saved it for me, Purito too and, Jens. If the Team Sly Skeletor Squad had done it again today that woulda really have been the worst. I give thanks for all the crumbs the Aicar boys leave on the table. Ritchey Porte managed to look better than the head skeletor, and he did it while looking sorta like a living human being as well. Team Tinked-Off might want to give Kreuzinger a chance,since he seems to be looking like he's not shootin' blanks like Pistolero. Being here in France I'm not subjected to the Mandatory Andy Schleck Commentary and the hate on Contador like the Phil and Paul show must be forced to do. Small steps....

Rosemary said...

So happy Purito is on the podium!

I am also happy I managed to get access to Eurosport Live and I am not forced to watch endless commercials and listen to Paul and Phil (sorry RJ). I am sure in time that Carlton Kirby's over enthusiastic announcing (and Sean Kelly's lack of) will get to me.