Tuesday, July 23, 2013

It's Yer Post-Tour Celebrations 'n' Recriminations Roundup!

Yep, the fallout's fallin' thick 'n' fast outta Tour de France 2013, with BMC boss John Lelangue, with Cadel's future perhaps in doubt, heading out for "personal reasons," which generally means "we'll personally smack you upside the head if you personally *ever* come near our riders again," Froomey's team buying him a Jag to keep him pacified over Brad's continued existence, Trek purchasing both Schlecks despite Frank's just-expired ban because of Andy's faintest-hint-o-hope performance, sprint star Marcel Kittel getting a contract extension over his weird prior blood "treatments" because apparently they didn't help increase oxygen-carrying capacity anyway, and, most notably, erratic moneybags Contador team boss Oleg Tinkov threatening to make the whole lot of 'em look for a new sponsor and run for the hills because they made him look like a bragging clueless jackwagon talking so much smack about Sky. On the plus side, there's about to be a *whole* lotta high-end if lately underperforming talent to be had dirt-cheap for some lucky squads! Heck, when the official '98 Tour de France doping news officially breaks tomorrow, there's bound to be more'n one manager in the ranks who'll be grateful to keep their jobs as well...let the bargain-hunting begin!

The Vuelta Shapes Up!: meantime, it's starting to be clear who's all-in, and who's merely in, for the fabulous Vuelta a Espana, with Samuel Sanchez ready to fight for Euskaltel (and its very existence!), last year's Sky double-threat Rigoberto Uran and Sergio Henao coming in bright 'n' rested, a tired though determined Valverde looking to avenge his wheel-screwed Tour, Purito Rodriguez saying the Worlds are actually more important to him--what?! are you on *crack* Purito?!--Ivan Basso rarin' to go after being jacked outta the Tour by an extremely gnarly giant cyst of the buttal region, everyone still waiting on Contador, and, for my money besides Samu' who will make everyone cry for mercy, a fresh and excited Vincenzo Nibali. Forza Il Squalo, and aupa Samu--the rest of you guys, you just *wish*!

Well, I guess it's on to (half)-Truth 'n' Reconciliation tomorrow. Me, now that I'm over the shock of the Janster being dirty, I'll just keep tracking the road to the glorious Vuelta!

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