Thursday, July 21, 2011

Alberto Contador's Last Stand

Okay, It's Over: so the sun has set on Alberto Contador's Tour de France, and while you can hardly diss the boy after he alone among the GC contenders rode (and blitzed) the Giro (in case he was banned from the Tour, but whatever), then spent days in the Pyrenees nursing a sore kneecap--tho' you can *certainly* blame Bjarne for his spectacular dumbassity in letting Alberto effectively lose the Tour on stage 1 getting caught behind that stupid crash--I gotta say, I'm rather sorry for him, and Andy Schleck's been so unbearably whiny the last week I was seriously hoping Contador--hell, even Schleck's own team--would kick his !@# on the Galibier just on principle. But whatever his troubles, as his completely gobsmacked poor face showed, Alberto, classy about it as he was,just didn't have it in the end, and by any measure--including, for sure, tactical sense--if Cadel finally gets his Tour in Paris there can be no doubt he's earned it with every excruciating pedal-stroke. If the mightily tenacious French re-phenom Voeckler nails it? Holy crap, that'd be epic, but don't tell me you won't feel slightly, well, surprised, you liar liar pants on fire! And Bjarne--if you even *think* about using that new pile of Saxo Bank dough to try to buy out we love Samuel Sanchez from under Euskaltel in exchange for say the Vuelta, you can just !@#$%^%$ *&^%$#% yer frickin' !@#$$! #$% (*&^, you !@#$ #@#$%er! Anyway, starting about 11:30 in, here's Voeckler's brilliant, almost heartbreaking, lug to the line: Beautiful!

It Ain't Easy Being Green: meantime, forget the fact that Cav's in-the-bag green jersey is now back in play due to a 20-point penalty for blowing the time cut (along with half the peloton, to be fair)--more important than Rojas squealing like a kid at Christmas over his good fortune, what the hell has gotten into the Manx Missile lately? Where even the perpetually-genteel Tyler Farrar has fallen prey to a very brief (and instantly retracted) bout of smack-talk, Cav has apparently replaced his entire personality with some hideously saccharine Smurf's, generously complimenting everyone from Thor Hushovd to the guy who takes his urine sample with nary a complaint or insult in sight. Come back to us, Mark--I cannot *take* Andy Schleck's whinging as a cheap substitute to your !@#$ed-off perfection!

Yer Lance Armstrong Question o' the Day: last but not least, for those of us subject to those nonstop Miller High Life commercials on Versus, am I the only one thinkin' the only reason they finally stopped running the ones with Lance jovially chatting and mountain-biking with a buncha other pretty folks is because he must've threatened to rip the arm off the lowly peon actor who dared touch him on the shoulder during the party scene? Oh, well, I'm sure it didn't hurt *so* much with that nice beer buzz on and all...

2 comments:

PJ said...

Riis is to blame for Contador's bad TDF. Greed. Pushing him to ride two consecutive tours so close together was and is stupid. It shows an appalling lack of concern for the person. Contador is truly a sportsman and a champion.

And Lance? Lance who? Hasn't he gone bye bye? I record the tours so I happily fast forward through those pitiful ads.

Rosemary said...

Yes, worth the extra payment for my DVR....my head would pop if I had to watch all those commercials!