Sunday, April 24, 2011

What the Schleck?!

Gilbert on a Tear: y'know, I'm quite fond of the Schlecks (yes, I know Frank's got a checkered past, but since he's not Roberto or Iban or even Simoni snorting his grandmother's coke-tainted "candies", I'm not particularly gonna defend him), but if the two of 'em together can't tag-team Philippe Gilbert out of a win, classy as the boys were in inevitable defeat it's a pretty good thing for everybody's egos that the Ardennes classics are history and they can all just pack it up 'til he bags a few rolling stages in the Tour and Andy still snuggles safe in the GC. Next year the whole peloton can go all Cancellara on his !@# marking him and regain some dignity then. Here's the last 3k: You go, Philippe!

You Suck, Versus!: meanwhile, can I just say as an American viewer that you !@#$in *suck*, Versus! Don't !@#$in' tease me with Phil all tweeting the impending coverage and then tell me in 3 different places on your damn website you're gonna show it at 3 different times, then replace it entirely with an entire afternoon of Captain Inbred's House of Bass-Fishing 'n' Banjo Playin' or whatever catastrophically non-time-sensitive bul!@#$ you're gonna show instead--*dammit*! Look, frankly I'm inordinately grateful whenever you show a freakin' thing related to cycling besides that poison-ivy irritation of a Lance Armstrong Amstel No-Cal commercial or whatever it is, but is there *anything* we American cycling fans can do that won't make our mommas wash our mouths out with soap to make you pony up a !@#damn race on TV before it's time for the next year's edition to be on already? You *blow*--now double Phil and Paul's salary and put 'em on in a timely manner you !@#$%&%#*s!

Fear And Loathing In Italy: in upcoming race news, I see even wavering-vegan Contador's a bit freaked by some of the climbs he's been recon-ing for the Giro d'Italia, and for my money, if I were the brilliant little squirt, I'd be more afraid of an angry Italian tifoso whackin' him off the side of the mountain than the climbs themselves. Don't worry, Alberto--I'm sure with your (alleged!) connections, you can find *some* !@#$ that'll make you grow eyes on the back of your head! That said, even I can't help but be truly suckered by a guy who's clearly so nice to his dog: Heck, you just name a blood bag after him, kid, and you've got Basso and Valverde written all over you!

4 comments:

@tourpro said...

You caused me to actually check the Epic Cycle Schedule.

"April 24 @ 12:30-2:30am".

Did anyone stay up to watch that? Or is that a typo?

jt said...

Coverage on Versus is so poor anyway - I just watch it live online via Steephill.tv. And best of all, watch the various highlight clips in the "Videozone" at sporza.be - for LBL they have clips of each of the last hills ("Beklimmingen") plus the final K, plus a brief overall report. All in Dutch, but frankly I get more out of Michel Wuyts in Dutch (only understanding 20%) than Sherwen Liggett nonsense in English where I understand it all.

Rosemary said...

I was set to watch Versus last night (on the west coast it was to air at 10pm)...I finally gave up checking after an hour with the Basketball Developmental League running late.

racejunkie said...

Yes, they showed it overnight. They did replay it Monday though--I caught the last 3k just in time to hear Phil report that Gilbert was in a "Luxembourg sandwich." You *suck*, Versus!

Agreed on Steephill.tv. I try to watch RAI for the Italian commentary--but I better start learning Dutch!