Don't Do It, Sastre!

Leave Dear Little Sastre Alone, Cervelo You Goons!: fine, Thor Hushovd is still hurt, not like it's gonna affect him at all, but really, with Boonen wounded, Robbie McEwen still violently allergic to the mountains, and Cav just acting like a wank, is any of that really gonna jack him out of the points jersey? No, so suck it, and why the !@#$ is Sastre riding the Tour de freakin' France 10 seconds after he's healed from his back injury? Do you *want* him to be a bodily train wreck for the next twelve months? Of course, if Carlos says it's okay, it must be, but if it's not, you *suck* Cervelo--get over your sponsor-whore pressure-cooker instincts and let the poor boy ride the Vuelta instead!

No More Mr. Nice Guy: yes, as Alberto Contador shrugs off the flu that's keeping him out of the Spanish nats but surely can't be great for his Tour prep, humble angel Ivan Basso's cutting the saint crap at last and getting down to business, telling gazzetta dello sport that he's not afraid of the climbs, he's not afraid of anything, and he's certainly not afraid of Alberto Contador. I was hoping he couldn't keep up this dreamy-eyed martyr bull!@#$ forever--you go Ivan, if you can without the, um, particular strength you had in 2006!

I Wanna Schlecks You Up: okay, let's cut to it: Frank's looking absolutely bitchin' after his surprise (to me--weren't you?) win at the Tour de Suisse, Andy is, honestly, a little less so but he's still got some time to tweak or even ride into his form so I'm trying not to let my head explode, Carlos is !@#$ed, Cadel is solid as always plus with his new wild-card ability to attack, Ivan I still think is overreaching, so what of Lance? For my money, he just looks really good, not great. So to me, the question is will he be either (1) consistently steady enough to win even without a great stage or two or (2) able to pull away from his rivals if/when he needs to? He certainly can't beat Contador there, tho' it's always likely our pretty boy will do something tactically stupid, but if he don't, even with The One having Levi Klodi and every other top cyclist on earth to dope-smack into submission, my bet’s still on Contador. Even so, I can't bring myself to root for the little pain in the !@#, so allez allez Schleck!

Emma, Queen of Trentino: finally, compliments to Emma Pooley on her humungous win at the Giro del Trentino, and particularly to Eleonora Patuzzo on her smashing acceleration from a formidable breakaway including Judith Arndt to take the final stage. Check out the celebratory champagne sprays: Forza Azzurri--and on to the Giro Donne, baby!