Holy Fakeout, Contador!; And, Enter to Win Our Week Three Contest!

Come Sail Away/Come Sail Away/Come Sail Away With Me (If You Can): y'know, I honestly don't know which looks worse--Contador's just blowing after his ban, or Contador blowing Purito outta the water after his ban. And if weren't for the sheer strategic masterpiece that made this amazing result possible, frankly, I'd be diving desperately right now for my happy rainbow trusting place, which is still a smoking ruin from like 2006. But nice fakeout pimping the Bola del Mundo at the press conference yesterday Alberto, and dang, that must've been one hell of a rest day! Still, I'm quite crushed for Rodriguez, who really was earning this Vuelta bravely against Alberto's two-week-long string of fruitless ankle-nipper attacks, which apparently whacked 'im all at once today and who, of course, took his devastating loss with sportsmanship and grace. Say what the hell you want about Alberto and Bjarne (and I will), but this was just !@#$in' brilliant. So do the last five minutes if you must, but man, if you've got more time to burn, watch the incredible scene play out!:

News Shorts: meantime, I could go on with the in-depth analysis that the following items deserve, but because I love both my faithful readers I'll keep this mercifully short: Tyler's still wankin', Pat "Dick" McQuaid's still wussily proclaiming Armstrong-neutrality and screwing women's cycling, Andy Schleck's still out of commission and still needs to learn to (1) freakin' descend already and (2) ride without his brother, and, last but not least, clean-sport advocate Jonathan Vaughters has officially outed Tommy D, Christian Vande Velde, and Dave Zabriskie as ex-dopers, but *does* at least admit he won't work with Jorg Jaksche not because he's a doper, but because he's an !@#hole. Ugh, glad we got all that out on the table--please, can we get the women some !@#damn airtime for once and get back to actual bike racing now?

Name That Podium!: finally, enter here to win Part Tres of our contest--may eternal glory (and bitchin' prizes) be yours! a Rafflecopter giveaway