What the !@#$ Is Wrong With You, Versus?: there he is. We love Samuel Sanchez of we love Euskaltel-Euskadi is proudly taking the podium in his polka-dot jersey. And what are *you* disrespectful clowns doing? Ignoring it and interviewing Mark Cavendish, with his giant head blocking even the big spectator's video screen! How does he "feel" about winning the green jersey? Happy, you asshats--now get your priorities straight, and give Samu' the glory he deserves! Here, I'll fix it:
Now don't do that again!Garmin Just Gets Cooler: sure, despite Jonathan Vaughters cruelly screwing Thor "Mountain Goat" Hushovd out of a decent hotel room, it's hard to imagine how much more bitchin' the squad could get at this Tour, but as bone-broken crash-out Dave Zabriskie comforts himself for missing the party in Paris by hitting the show at Comic-Con, Garmin does their man a solid by including a life-size paper cut-out of 'im on the podium at the best-team presentation. Take heart Dave Z--I'm sure you'll be back there at the end for real in 2012!
Speaking of Who's Not on the Podium: and, watch out Schlecks and freakin' learn to TT if you can (and on my end, it's nice to be right for once)--I see that Contador *is* in fact not riding the Giro in 2012 (a wholly uncalled-for jerkfaced slap to a beautiful and of course far superior race that openly loves you, though, Alberto, unlike the hissing French, by saying you'll "never" do it again) to focus on winning the Tour. Looks like someone's after your record there, Lance--let's just hope he's got the same luck getting completely off the hook for, uh, nothin'!
All Right, Cav Fans: finally, while it's true Cav could barely get up a mountain on a helicopter, much less two wheels, and I normally don't have that much use for sprinters and their constant TV-ho ego trips, he *did* work his butt off on the intermediate sprint points, and, more, over a bucket o' inevitable stage wins solidified his well-deserved rep as the fastest bloke on two wheels. Congrats, Cav--and next time Samu is getting accolades, back the hell off the stupid press and bow to him like he deserves!
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