Monday, September 09, 2013

It's Yer Vuelta a Espana Rest-Day Roundup; and, Bonus Boonen Nut News Part Dos! #lavuelta

Argy-Barguil: Sure, Giorgia Bronzini grabbed another stage, Cadel Evans bagged his first win of the season--pack o' late bloomers this year BMC, nice to see!--and Sagan thrilled the crowds and bought a white cowboy hat, but over at the Vuelta it's the mountains, baby, and guess who's reigning triumphant? Yep, France's Next Great Hope, 21 year old Argos climber Warren Barguil, outsmarting the likes of Rigoberto Uran and pretty well every other stage-stealing hopeful with his second win in four days. So what else is up? Well:

--that's right, Horner continued to ride like a freak, which, if he won, 'd not only make him the Oldest Grand Tour Winner of All Time, but also Guy Most Stuck Full of Needle Holes (by the narcs, calm down!) to Still Survive a Grand Tour. Either way, a notable accomplishment!

--so Nibali finally cracked today. Fifty seconds was comfy. Twenty-odd is, frankly, a bit nerve-wracking. But the Shark remains tranquillo, and is ready to take Horner out in the last few days' steeper ramps. Me, I'm still betting on Nibali--so Chris Purito Roche Valverde and Samu (shut up! will too!), good luck sluggin' it out for the rest of the podium!

--when the Belgians drop out of a race due to cold, you *know* it's bull!@#$. Bad enough the Pyreneean Meat Locker o' Carnage blasted poor Ivan Basso--who really looked great--Roman Kreuziger and LL Cool Sanchez outta the saddle, and Gilbert had good reasons to go anyway, but really? Jelle Vanendert? Nick Nuyens? Poor pelotonsicles!

--didja see who's leading the team classification? It's our beloved Euskaltel-Euskadi, honey--woooooooooo-hooooooooooooooooooooo! Now, onto the stage wins--will too either, haters!

Guess Who's Back(Door) in Training (Almost)! in other cycling news, in a truly pass-out-worthy description of his healing perineal region (at least for the more ladylike among us), bad-luck Classics bad-boy Tom Boonen is but (ha! I said "but!") a few weeks away from resuming training, which means, barring a freak elbow infection, training crash, Lamborghini bang-up, club-drug relapse, or another ginormous monster meteorite of a cyst, he'll be back on form and back in action for a stormin' old-school Tommeke 2014 Classics campaign. Get well soon, Tom--not only 'cause we love you, but 'cause we can't bear any more graphic details!

I'm Glad It's Your Birthday/Happy Birthday To You: last but not least, happy 32nd birthday to ragin' late-season squadra azzurra contender/primo peloton pinup Pippo Pozzato, clearly enjoying his recent down time. Buon Compleanno Pippo!

Okay, rest up everyone--it ain't over yet, and we've still got some serious mountains left to go!

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